When I first started out as a wedding photographer in Northern California, posing felt… awkward. Not for my couples — for me. I had these visions of romantic, artful images with emotion and movement, but when it came to actually directing people into a pose? I kind of froze. (You too? You’re not alone.)
Looking back, I wish someone had told me these four things — because they changed everything for me when it came to posing, connection, and creating images that feel like art.
Talk Them Through the Process
One of the biggest things I’ve learned? People just want to know what to expect. Wedding days are filled with nerves (and not just for the couple — sometimes for the photographer too), but the second I started explaining what I was doing before I started clicking the shutter, I noticed a shift.
Now, I always take a minute before we start to explain where we’ll be shooting, how I’ll walk them through each pose, and what the overall flow will look like. When clients know what’s coming, they relax. And relaxed people = better photos. Every time.
Ask About Their Preferences
Before I lift the camera, I ask if there’s anything they’re self-conscious about or anything they love and want to highlight. It could be a favorite side, a detail on their dress, or the way their partner holds their hand.
That little moment of listening helps me choose poses that make them feel confident — and when clients feel good, the photos show it.
Keep the Conversation Going
I used to think I needed to be quiet to “focus.” Now? I don’t stop talking. I ask questions about how they met, what they love to do together, what their wedding day means to them.
Getting them to talk helps their real personalities shine through. I’m not just capturing a pose — I’m capturing them, and that’s what gives images their emotional weight. Plus, those little side smiles and inside jokes? They only come out when people feel seen and heard.
Scout the Space Ahead of Time
This is a big one for shooting luxury weddings in Northern California. From vineyards to coastal cliffs to historic estates — no two venues are the same, and you want your posing to reflect that.
I always try to arrive early and walk the property before portraits. I look for where the light is falling, where I can play with levels or symmetry or leading lines. Yes, having a few go-to poses in your back pocket is super helpful — but leaning into the environment and letting it inspire you makes the photos way more unique (and high-end clients love that elevated, intentional touch).
If you’re a new wedding photographer just getting started, know this: posing is something you’ll grow into. It doesn’t have to be stiff or overly structured — it can be a conversation, a collaboration, a little bit of movement and a whole lot of trust. If you want more helpful tips like this, sign up for my Photographer Education email list here!
And if you’re a couple reading this, wondering if you’ll feel awkward in front of the camera — don’t worry. I’ve got you. And please reach out if you’re interested in working together 💛
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